In a previous post, I made a statement that could be seen as disparaging to Nashville in general and the Opryland Hotel in specific. I have now spent several days at the Opryland. Below is a scientific comparison showing the benefits of each location, provided for your use in determining where to celebrate your second wedding.
Advantage Vegas is indicated via the Elvis icon.
Advantage Opryland is indicated via the Johnny Cash icon.
|Large, complicated hotel layout that requires a map to find your way from your room to the lobby.||Check.||Neither|
Scads of scantily-clad women running around ignoring the conventioneers.
|Check, but that may have been due to the Victoria’s Secret convention being held in the hall one level up.||Neither|
|Obsequious and helpful employees obviously working on a larger tip.||Same, but more subtle. Score one for southern hospitality.|
|The slim chance of winning a few dollars at the ubiquitous casinos.||No gambling. This is the Bible belt.|
|The enormous chance of losing many dollars at the ubiquitous casinos.||No gambling. This is the Bible belt.|
|Tourists in sequins going out for the evening.||Tourists in sequins and boots going out for the evening.||Let's call that a draw.|
|Poor television choices – they want you in the casinos.||Adequate television choices, but all of the country music stations are at the top of the dial.|
|Incredibly expensive room rates and punitive tax adders.||Incredibly expensive room rates and punitive tax adders.||Everyone but the tourists.|
|Numerous shops inside the hotel complex selling high end items that you can’t afford.||Numerous shops inside the hotel complex selling everything from high-end to junk touristy tchotchkes for the kids.||Singles and DINKs|
|Very fancy and overpriced restaurants throughout the complex.||Not fancy but still overpriced restaurants throughout the complex.|
|No way to see the outside world so you completely lose track of the time of day.||The occasional window to the outside world.|
|Pulsating screens advertising night clubs for people much younger and more attractive than you.||Pulsating screens advertising one night club for people much younger and more attractive than you.||(People younger than me and voyeurs.)|
|Walking on the strip is its own entertainment.||They closed the Opryland Theme Park next door, but the mall is interesting.|
|Have to fly and take a cab to get to a Vegas hotel.||Within driving distance of my house.|