My new voice mail message

This is all kinds of awesome.

My new voice mail message.

Thanks for Distractions

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, we can all be thankful for the distractions offered by office internet connections.

• The Muppets do Bohemian Rhapsody
• The Amazing Randi claims the 23 year coma patient story is too good to be true
• Shrinking coins with magnetic fields for fun and profit
• Change we can all believe in
• Things you think you can do, but you can't: jump rope, shuffle cards
  

A little history lesson about Alexander Hamilton

History taught as a series of spirit-crushing dates and names should be unlawful. History is vibrant and exciting and the stories of real people with fascinating lives.

Quote of the day

And the quote of the day is ...

"Great. Humanitarian tanks."

The Funniest Sketch Ever on Television

Ladies and Gentlemen, lest we forget the genius that was the cast of the Carol Burnett show.



I remember seeing this sketch outtake on a "Best of ..." episode of the show as a child. I nearly passed out, laughing so hard, unable to breathe.

Some days we just need a laugh more than others.

Minnesotans for Global Warming

It's a cause we can all get behind, don't you agree?

Amazon's DRM-free music

Amazon has, for the last few months, been offering DRM-free music downloads. That means that a song or album that you buy from them comes in a standard MP3 format, not some proprietary, locked format that only plays on specific hardware. This is important to me because (1) I use my Treo phone as my music player and it only plays MP3s, (2) I like music and listen to it often, and (3) I have a conscience that won't allow me to download illicit MP3s. That means that I was left to purchasing actual CDs and ripping songs (which, despite RIAA arguments to the contrary, is still legal). The biggest problem with Amazon's music was it's extremely limited selection. That's all changed now that Warner has added their library to the mix. They now have music that I would pay - and have paid - 99 cents for. Therefore, as a public service, I present for you a few easy listening pieces from my current playlist. The list to the right was specifically created to put you into a productive mood whether it be working, studying, or driving down a deserted highway at night with the windows open. The Amazon solution isn't perfect yet. There are no tracks by Rage Against the Machine or (surprise!) Metallica. You'll just have to make do with the few hundred other options available now. Happy listening!

A childhood well spent

	I received 71 credits on The Sci Fi Sounds Quiz How much of a Sci-Fi geek are you?
Take the Sci-Fi Movie Quiz powershot s5

Seriously, why aren't you reading XKCD every day?

OK. Here's a sample. But that's all you're going to get on this site. You must click below and read daily. People this funny and intelligent must be supported.

Geektastic Links for Thanksgiving

Couldn't resist sharing for the holidays. Happy Turkey Day everyone!

• DC power service - originally provided by Thomas Edison's company - in Manhattan is finally being discontinued. Now when will they start discontinuing the hundreds of obsolete telecommunications protocols that we poor equipment vendors are still being asked to support?
• Some of the coolest natural phenomena in the world. Plan your next vacation accordingly.
• Negative refractive index materials. I would consider returning to academia just for the chance to ponder all of the implications of this stuff ... like stopping light completely.
• Mathematical proof that Futurama is indeed the geekiest show on television. It lapses into Spanish towards the end. This means something ....
• You must read this webcomic. Anyone who can make a joke that requires knowing the periodic table symbol for tin is a verifiable genius.
• I could be on this list if I wanted to be. I'd be at least a 300. I just don't like taking tests anymore....
• Ever listened to the sounds the road makes and wonder if you could engineer it to make music? Um, no, me neither. That would be weird, wouldn't it. Ahem.
• You, too can draw fractals by hand. Sure it takes a few hours to get something passable, but it involves math and really, what better did you have to do today?
  

I gotta make me one of these

I'm usually not one to pass along links, but how can I pass up a Blu-ray Star Trek phaser? This, I may have to make.

I had a Star Trek phaser as a kid. Mine made cool "phaser" noises when you pulled the trigger (and you could put shape filters on the front to project an Enterprise or other shapes on the walls - but that's not really relevant). It was the weapon of choice in the neighborhood war games because your couldn't call "missed me" when the light was shining on your chest. Plus, you didn't have to keep yelling "bang" due to the nifty phaser noises.

Wouldn't it be cool if this one made those noises? I wouldn't recommend it for war games though. You'll put your eye out.

King on Rowling

Stephen King writes on the subject of J. K. Rowling. As usual, King again proves to be much smarter than his critics give him credit for.

I would sacrifice Rowling's riches to be able to write even something as small as a review like King.

(OK, maybe not. It would be a tough call.)

Please do not send any more links to online games

First it seemed kind of silly. Then I lost the game the first time and it became a challenge. Now I've managed to lose several otherwise productive hours.



Beat that!

Headline of the Day

Honestly, you can't make something like this up.

Lawyers want to dig for gold at home of spammer's parents

• distractions

Life imitates Merrie Melodies

• distractions

A plague of cats

Research has shown that women who are infected with [cats] tend to be more warm, outgoing and attentive to others, while infected men tend to be less intelligent and probably a bit boring. But both men and women who are infected are more prone to feeling guilty and insecure.

Did they really need research dollars to prove that? Just read a "Garfield" comic ... or spend some time with a few boring male cat owners.

• distractions

A Humble Suggestion for the Legal Team at Rogers Communications

This is a very interesting and quite helpful book. For $2.13million, you can buy roughly 160,000 copies (plus shipping).

See "Where did that come from" below for more details.

• telecommunications
• distractions
• humor

Distractions: The Video Edition

• Like the Mac/PC adds? Move along. Despise them, click on these
  
  • Working?
  • Gaming?
  • Networking?
  • And the ultimate – Performance
• For the Sci-Fi lover ... and the Sci-Fi despiser
  
• Star Trek meets Monty Python in Camelot
• Chad Vader - Day Shift Manager
  
• Some Japanese culture for your enjoyment
• The Samurai Sword is mightier than the gun (but you have to be pretty accurate)
• Japanese aerobic instructors teach you how to have a polite and happy mugging
• ... or fend off an admirer
  

• distractions

Your Latest Banana News from Popular Science

Yes! We have no bananas!

Forecasting the impending doom of America's favorite breakfast fruit and smoothie ingredient.

The blog is not expected to be impacted.

Filed in: creations distractions

Distractions

• The only blog operating within New Orleans after Katrina. Inspiring and intriguing.
  
• Turning an optical illusion into a profitable business (turning, get it?)
• A ad campaign with a nun holding a condom. Who would object to that?
• Rent a Rodent
• Q: Why did the surrealist cross the road? A: Orange.
• Doing the Star Trek whoosh door one better.
• "In the 69 years that the pitch has been dripping no-one has ever seen the drop fall."
• Bored teenagers. Unprotected McDonald's sign. A few power tools. Recipe for minor annoyance.
• Bored geeks. Large block of sodium. Water source. Recipe for large explosions.
• Virtual mugging. Be careful folks, it's a jungle in there and the geeks are running the show.
• Online karaoke - please practice before you go out in public.
• Animated film and song about Atlanta's gas situation.
• Robots in unexpected places.
• Finally those MIT guys come up with a useful invention. Carbonated ice cream. Sure beats those highly efficient photocells they've been working on for like ... ever.
• Patent illustrations from the 1920s. People were really into radiator caps.
• All of the strangest eBay auctions collected in a convenient blog format.
• Everyone needs a pet with a built-in tuxedo. Herring not included.
• Suprisingly, digging through the earth won't send you to China. At least not from my house.
• Surviving "unplanned" free-fall. As Steve McQueen said in The Magnificent Seven, "So far, so good."
• Finally, a chess game that's good for my ego.
• When they start going for boats, we're in trouble.
  

Filed in: distrations