Why I don't drink Diet Coke in Japan

Alternate titles:

• Coked up SJP
• New Taste! More SJP in every drop!
• Sex and the Aluminum Cylinder
• Sucking on SJP in Japan
• I don't know why people think Diet Coke is a chick soda
• Diet Coke Fail
  

Extra credit: Guess which of the alternate titles will result in the most erroneous hits from Google searches.